Times Are Changing

Perhaps it is the change of seasons or the bleak winter that approaches, or maybe even that my life around me is changing but something gives me an empty feeling.
It isn't too often that I express a joy for life. Quite the opposite in fact. Just when things get good and comfortable a big change has to come along a wash away my content for what is. Everyday is a constant struggle to keep a smile on my exhausted face.
Things just got worse. . .
The living situation I am in is less than ideal. Me and the wife-to-be live with our parents and split days that we stay at each others parents. Moving out would seem like the easy solution but that is nearly impossible given that Pitney pays $10 and hour to do the job of at least two people.
The pressure to move out gets ever so greater as things and people in my life change. I just found out yesterday that my father is definitely gonna marry this woman he has only been dating for 4 months. I wanna be happy for him but nothing but sorrow fills my emotions. To top that off he is gonna sell our house and his girlfriend is gonna sell hers so they can start 'fresh'. My house is my calm. I love that house so much. It is essentially my dream home. . .only my father owns it. It is a rancher with an acre of land set in the country. He just recently put solar panels on it to make it much more energy efficient. For years he has been making plans of retiring and settling down in this home for the remainder of his life. All of that has been thrown out the window.
How can I be happy for him or myself?? Maybe with time. . .

But now the seasons changing. A time of year I do not handle well at all. The days are getting much shorter. Everyday I am waking up knowing it is one step closer to old man winter. This past week getting out of bed has been arduous. For days I have fought myself on calling out and as I type this I contemplate whether I will be in work tomorrow.
I just want things to start looking up again. . .and stay that way!!!

Karma? Where are you? I do everything that I feel is right and that does not hurt others. Yet you shit on me everyday. What gives??

Got Sanchez?

Has anyone been watching Celebrity Fit Club? Who the funk thought it would be a good idea to put Screech on? The guy who just a few months ago was in a sex tape performing a Dirty Sanchez on two skanks?!? How he got one girl let alone two, remains inconceivable to me. Anyhow, he is on this show to try and lose weight and save his career(admitidly saying that he needs to save his career). Well, he is turning it into a platform for which he can act like a jerk-off and not try and lose weight but rather attract attention to himself by making extremely distasteful comments to his teammates and about mentally retarded people. In which he said it is damn funny to watch a retard fall down. Also, saying that his teammate could use a vibrator that he is marketing. All the while, gaining weight. I am not surprised though, considering that he smeared a girls poo across her upper lip.

So why did VH1 even put him on the air other than to purposely create drama? Here is to trying to save your house Screech!! Gonna need quite a few more patitions and charity/pity.

In other news:

WTFudgem!! How is it Paris Hilton only spends three days in jail but a 17yr old(at the time) is spending 10 years in jail for receiving oral sex from a 15yr old?!? Oh, by the way, it was taped. Check your local listings.

The kicker being that if he would have had intercourse with the girl it would have only been a misdeamor and there would have been no jail time. But the laws have since changed and now it is no longer a crime in which you serve jail time but they will not release the man citing that they can not retro-act the law. But don't worry, the beloved Paris is out of jail and spending 40 days on house arrest. In no time she will be on the streets driving drunk and possibly killing someone behind the wheel. Thanks for being a model skank-whore!!

Katie Melua - Just Like Heaven

This is, in my opinion, the best version of "Just Like Heaven" out there. For all you Cure fans, I alike, sorry, this song just sounds so much softer and sweeter when sung by Katie Melua. Isn't her voice so sexy and captivating??

"Trouble"

Trouble
Don't you see
That in your bed
I find no sleep
I confess you came because of me
Trouble get behind me now
Trouble let me be

Cold wet stone
Deep river bed
Once so clean and clear now runs red
You know to well
Was me that called you here
Trouble get behind me now
Trouble let me be

Oh sweet day
Leave me behind
I will never call on you
Until the day I die
Pray your mercy shine on me
Pray your mercy shine

Here I stand
Head bowed for thee
My empty heart begs you
Leave me be
But I confess
You know too well
That I have fallen
Pray your mercy give to me
Pray your mercy shine
Trouble, I'll not trouble thee
Let your mercy shine

Cold wet stone
River deep and red
Your cold heart beats inside my head
You know too well
It was me that brought you here
Oh, trouble get behind me now
Trouble let me be
I pray your mercy shine on me
Trouble let me be

Dave Matthews
Trouble